Tuesday, July 31, 2007

5/3/2006 - The Night That We Barfed All Over Georgia

May 3, 2006
That's the Night that We Barfed all over Georgia
Thursday we flew to Atlanta for my best friend’s wedding. Me, Hubs, Baby E and Baby J and my parents. This was a long awaited, very fancy schmancy weekend-affair, and all 6 of us were invited to the rehearsal dinner, wedding, reception and Sunday brunch. We spent big bucks on plane tickets, mini-van and car seats rentals, multiple new outfits all around and my fabulous Matron of Honor dress. Plus other essentials, etc, etc, etc.

The bride is my best friend and graciously invited all 6 of use to stay in her big, fabulous house. Thursday morning on the way to the airport Baby E had a rather Exorcist-like episode. I chalked it up to drinking too much milk in the car. Silly mommy. By that evening at the bride’s house, surrounded by her future in-laws, this developed into a full on, both-ends-at-once stomach virus. Hasty clean-ups were made and kept hidden from the bride and her family. Tom decided that he would stay home with Baby E so we could attend all the rehearsal activities and they could weather the barf storm in peace.

Friday Baby J and I and the parents went to rehearsal and all was well. Came home to an almost completely recovered Baby E. Things were looking good for wedding attendance by all six of us the next day. Then it hit me like a train around midnight, and Baby J a short while later. There I am with it coming out both ends, trying to surreptitiously wash sheets, towels bathmats and clothes, and help hubs try to control further damage by sick Baby J, and keep from waking sleeping Baby E, all under cover of night so as not to wake the bride to be.

A few short hours later bride awakes and I am now needed to attend to her. Out went all of my previous visions of a sweet bonding time with my best friend on her wedding day as I concentrated on just not throwing up on her. Tom was staying home with both boys so my parents and I could still represent at the wedding. My mother was trying to convince me to let bride in on my plight as my mother feared I would collapse on the altar (or whatever Baptists call the altar) and end up on America’s Not So Funny Wedding Videos as I took the bride and flower girl down with me. I couldn’t. It was her wedding day and I was going to be the best damn (nauseous, lightheaded, clammy and dehydrated) Matron of Honor I could be.

The ceremony lasted over 40 minutes, during which time I STOOD. In HIGH heels. On the altar/whatever. I truly did not think the minister would ever stop talking. I could feel the cold sweat running down my cleavage and my legs as I tried to calculate exactly how much vomit my bouquet could hold. Finally, finally, it ended.

Parents and I proceeded to reception, where I was feeling a smidgen better. Halfway through reception, I knew we were in trouble when my Dad said he “needed some air”. Yep, another one biting the dust. We lasted through the cake cutting and then raced home. Both babies were doing much better but now Tom and Dad were stricken and both went to bed at 4pm. Did not see or hear from them again until 7am the next day.

We decided to forego any attempts to attend the brunch out of fear that the virus had caught on elsewhere in the wedding party and we would be stoned to death.

Let’s review:
Number of wedding activities we were supposed to attend - 4
Number of wedding activities my husband got to attend – 0
Number of loads of laundry I did – 9
Number of dollars spent to take our virus on the road - >1000
Number of bodily functions incidents, all participants - >36
A positive, my complete and utter drainage of all bodily fluids the night before the wedding made my dress fit really well.

An even bigger positive – the bride looked beautiful and the wedding, what I remember of it, was Fab.U.Lous.

It’s good to be home.
Posted by Michele at 5/03/2006 11:21:00 AM
Sheri said...
oh God - the stomach virus' are the worst! I'm sorry that it wans't the wedding you envisioned it to be but I'm sure your best friend was thriled to have you there. 2 Christmas' ago we all came down with some sort of sickness the likes we had never seen. My daughter was barfing every hour for about 8 hours and then was fine. I had all I could do to make it to the bathroom with a shower curtain draped around myself to catch whatever body fluids were coming out of all orifices at once. I think I remember wishing I was dead a few times. Glad you're home safe and sound and I hope you all are feeling better.
May 3, 2006 1:20:00 PM
Rachel said...
It sucks to have the stomach virus, even worse to have it while one or both of your kids have it, and the absolute worse to have all that happening when you're away from home. Glad you're feeling better now!
May 3, 2006 2:09:00 PM
Amy said...
OOOOOH! So sorry to hear that! Nothing worse than being sick with sick kids than being sick with sick kids away from home. Hope everyone is feeling better!
May 3, 2006 2:15:00 PM
macboudica said...
Well, sounds like you had a fun weekend. At least it seems like a quick virus. Last summer I was sick with a stomack/intestinal bug that would not go away. For months. I spent our family vacation Up North eating canned chicken soup and Pepto while eeryone else ate the fabulous meals my step-mother-in-law (a terriffic chef) prepared.I hope everyone is feeling better!
May 3, 2006 4:00:00 PM
sherry said...
Dear god, woman. I'm sorry you puked your way through a wedding weekend.Glad you're home and well!
May 3, 2006 11:43:00 PM
Oh, The Joys said...
AAAAACK! My baby girl had the plague for ten days. TEN!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH.
Jul 2, 2006 2:20:00 PM

No comments: